Tim Dowling describes turning his illness into an art form

Dowling acts sick all day

Tim Dowling sits at a kitchen table on a Wednesday morning feeling dizzy and feverish. He claims the nature of his illness is episodic but lets up for an hour or two in the afternoons. His wife enters the room and asks why he must act like he is ill instead of just being sick. Dowling explains that groaning and sighing are symptoms rather than affectations while his cough is a genuine symptom. He states that taking pills helps but there are no pills left for him to consume.

Family members catch the bug

The middle child comes downstairs with a lingering week-old cough which Dowling identifies as Patient Zero. The wife notes that her husband always has to act out the whole thing regarding his condition. By Saturday morning the illness has passed to the wife who feels sick and pulls the duvet over her head. Dowling admits this is an assured performance even though he remains ill himself while asking if she will walk the dog.

Dowling considers faking wellness

Over the next 24 hours his symptoms remain stable but his mood sinks further because he is bored. He becomes tired of inhabiting this illness and tired of the illness inhabiting him at the same time. Dowling wonders if an acting-led approach might be part of his recovery process to fake wellness until he makes it. He considers accepting his wife feedback about internalising suffering while wearing a busy day on his sleeve more.